Hurry Up and Wait

*Sigh* the time since my last post has been such a trying time. If I could to give it a name it would certainly be 'Hurry Up and Wait'. As I mentioned in my first post that most of this blog would be about the transition period my husband and I were entering as he finishes up school and tries to break into his industry so that I can stay at home with our two precious boys - where I believe the Lord has called me. Almost two weeks ago was an AMAZING time we were really seeing the Lord move. My husband had an interview with a major company for an entry level position and then the next day he got called back for another interview with an EVEN BIGGER company with MORE PAY! We thought we would have heard something by now --- but NOTHING! We know they haven't filled the positions (there was more than one) but other than that that's all we know.

My faith felt like it was on the mountain - and it was - but now as we wait I am feeling it wain a little. I am trying to keep myself encouraged and remember the promises of God and the blessings I have been speaking of my husband - for divine connections and appointments, for favor with these companies, that he would be offered a career/opportunity that we couldn't have even imagined. So while I am hurrying to wait I am having to return to the promises and rest in the Lord.

My husband is such a wonderful encourager and reminds me often to 'be patient, grasshopper!'. I am so thankful for him. So I will wait and commit my ways to him because he knows the desires of our heart.

Thank you for your prayers!

Promised Post: Small Ways To Show Your Husband You Love Him

First, allow me to apologize for not delivering this post as promised, but the reason shall be the first entry in the list of 'Small Ways To Show Your Husband You Love Him!"

1. Don't ask to use the computer when he's working so diligently to complete projects for school and upcoming competition.
2. Greet him at the door when he arrives home.
3. Fix his favorite meal or dessert.
4. Write him a love note and slip it in his lunch or tape it to his steering wheel the night before.
5. Call his office after hours and leave a voice mail for him to listen to the next day.
6. Write on the bathroom mirror with lipstick how much you love him while he's in the shower.
7. Send him texts throughout the day encouraging him and reminding him what a great husband/father he is!
8. Watch a movie with him you don't particularly care for, probably an action flick.
9. Send him a email everyday for the week and focus on one particular attribute that makes him a great husband.
10. YOU plan the date night!
11. Ask to pray a prayer of blessing over him and extort him in prayer.
12. Snuggle together - it truly is a lost art!
13. Make him a coupon book redeemable for activities he enjoys (it can be naughty or nice).
14. Make a CD of songs that remind you of him and your love for him.
15. Write on his facebook page about what a blessed wife you are to have him!
16. When he's sick, baby him!
17. Buy him that special thing he's been wanting (for mine it would be a new release video game).
18. Watch sports with him and make an effort to understand what is going on (I still don't get football).
19. Brag on him in front of his friends and family.
20. Tell your children all the reasons you love him!
21. Look at wedding pictures together or watch your wedding video together.
21. Have a small cake made of your wedding cake flavor to share.
22. Celebrate 1/2 anniversary (plus its a good reason to celebrate!)
23. Button his shirt for him when he's getting dressed in the morning, unbutton it for him at night!
24. Tie his tie for him (if you can, I would probably just put mine in a noose)
25. Be the first to apologize in an argument.
26. Kiss him often!
27. Give him a back and foot massage.
28. Help him shave.
29. Start a hobby together.
30. Take a walk together

What other ways can you think to show your husband you love him?!

Standing for your man

 

Take yourself back to the sitcoms of 'yesteryear' and remember the dynamics between the husband and the wife, the mother and the children, and the father and the children. Now, fast forward to today's sitcoms and you'll see a stark difference in all of these relationships as they pertain to the role of the husband and father. Husbands and fathers who used to be honored and respected are now portrayed as incompetent, requiring the child-like direction of their wives and sometimes children to make the simplest of decisions. What used to be acts of love and kind gestures towards the husband, such as preparing breakfast, packing a lunch, or pouring a cup of coffee are now portrayed as daunting tasks far above a working woman. I wonder what kind of social outrage it would cause if women were portrayed in such a manner?

My goal is not to start a debate, but rather a discussion within ourselves as Christian wives and mothers. Do we sometimes adopt this way of this thinking? Have we allowed ourselves to be influenced by media such as this or drawn into the 'husband bashing' gossip sessions at work? Most likely the answer to at least one of these question is 'yes' (I know it is for me) because we're human and we're fallible. Perhaps this is the take away thought:

Because we are fallible people, we would be foolish to think our marriage doesn't need safeguarding. After all that's what marriage is - a joining of two fallible people.

I would also like to add that not only should this love and honor be reciprocated to the wife but such an action is demanded. Ephesians 5:25 says, 'Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her." Now, I realize this is not the case in many marriages and this often leads the wife to withold honor and respect from her husband; however, this should not be the case. When we honor someone in authority we are not necessarily honoring them or endorsing their behavior, but rather the position they hold. This is a good way to teach obeying authority to your children, but it simply can not be verbalized it must be dramatized - your children will follow your actions before they follow your words.

I want to encourage you that is never too late to turn your marriage around. I also want to remind you that many times you have to mindful and intentional to develop such a dynamic between you and your husband. It is against our very nature to submit and honor authority, but with the help of Christ it can be done!

In Christ,
Created for this!

Dish Pan Hands

Last night I hesitantly took two allergy pills to treat my scratchy throat and watery eyes because I just knew I wouldn't be worth two cents in the morning. Thankfully, much to my surprise not only was I productive, but I accomplished much more than I had intended. Of course, I did have my morning coffee boost and some time with the Lord while I fed the baby, both of which I always find are vital to a productive day. 

While cleaning each room I began to think about the areas in my spirit that needed cleaning. I considered what heart matters had been gathering dust and things I needed to make right with the Lord. With this, I would simply like to encourage all the ladies who are jumping into spring cleaning to do some spiritual cleaning.

So how is your home spring cleaning going? What tips and tricks do you have for a deep cleaned house? Be sure to leave comments and check us out on our facebook page as well!

In Christ,

Created for this!

Power of Prayer: Something you may have never considered

The above picture of my son, DA, was taken while enroute to have his eye surgery. While it wasn't a major surgery it was surgery nonetheless. As you know, any surgery to a mother is MAJOR and obviously prayer was a top priority this day. Thankfully all went well and we haven't had a problem with the eye since - Praise the Lord!

Something I had never considered until the Lord revealed it to me many years ago is that pray goes hand in hand with blessings and curses.

Matthew 12:37 says, "For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned."

Matthew 26:39 says, " And he [Jesus] went a little further, and fell on his face, and prayed, saying, O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt."

While speaking with a friend one day who was in need of prayer over a family situation, I heard in the one breathe her saying all she could do was pray and trust God and in the next breathe she was speaking negatively about the situation. I brought this to her attention and encouraged her to be careful of her words because she was speaking things into exsistence. She really didn't seem to put much stock into what I was sharing with her but then the Lord revealed to me that you can't believe in prayer if you don't believe your words put things into motion in the spiritual realm. You see, in both of these verses we see that words have power and prayer is simply engaging in conversation with God with WORDS. So then, how can prayer be a staple of our spiritual diet but exercising caution of our words is missing?

I often find myself being guilty of this and mostly when I'm having a pity party but thankfully I am reminded of this revelation often. With revelation comes responsibility and for this reason I often wonder if the Lord showed me this connection more for myself than my friend.

I PRAY these scriptures have been an encouragement to you and this truth will be hidden in your heart and applied to your words daily!

Please feel free to leave a comment below about revelations you've had concerning prayer and the power of your words!

In Christ,
Created for this



Before you say, 'I do'

 

When my husband and I told our pastor we were engaged and would like him to perform the wedding he happily agreed on one condition: you have complete pre-marriage counseling. We both willing agreed because we believed it would be a great way to start our marriage! The sessions and discussions were wonderful and we both learned alot about what we expected out of the marriage and even how our views on crucial topics differed.

 



 

I liken the purpose of pre-marital counseling to that of the pre-buy home inspection. No one wants to UNKNOWINGLY purchase a home with considerable damage and needing extensive repairs. Your marriage, like a house, has a foundation that all your years to come will be built upon and like a home, without a solid foundation even normal and wear and tear can be more burdensome than in normal conditions. With this being said I would like to share some words of wisdom about marriage that should be considered even before you say 'Yes!' to the proposal.

 

 

1. Don't be unequally yolked. Not only is this a word of wisdom, it's biblical. 2 Corinthians 6:14 says, "Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?" After dating for 6 months I knew I would marry my husband but for his sanity I kept this revelation from him. While I knew this I also knew things were going to have to change in both of us. You see, I had made a lot of mistakes in relationship - that I couldn't take back or undo - but I had not yet been married and I saw this as the one thing I hadn't messed or up - I was determined to this right. I am glad to repor that my husband was the first of us to surrender to the Lord and rededicate his life. I couldn't imagine trying to lead a Godly lifestyle with a non-believer.
2. Every date is a possible mate. There doesn't have to be a proposal in sight to begin evaluating the purpose and goals of a relationship. Even on the first date it is not a bad idea to be on the look-out for how why this person could be a good spouse and lines up with your values and goals for marriage or why you should move on.
3. Make your marriage 'Move-In Ready'. It could also be said that unlike houses, a marriage is not something you want be a 'fixer-upper'. No, you want it to be move-in ready! Please avoid the mistake of believing that marriage will 'fix your spouse' or that marriage will bring your spouse to Christ. Please understand I know MANY spouses that came to the saving grace of Christ through their spouses witness. In fact the bible says in 1 Peter 3:1-2, "Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives." However, I am willing to bet that wives who have or are in marriages with an unbelieving spouse would quickly tell you this is not how you WANT to start a marriage.
4. Find a mentor. It never hurts to receive counsel and guidance from a good Christian married couple who can help nuture your growing relationship now and even into the marriage. Specifically for women Titus speaks to the older women teaching the younger women. Titus 2:3-5 says, "Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God."
5. Consider your reasons for marriage. This may sound like an odd piece of advice but really it's quite logical if you think about it. In the many diets I have attempted (and failed) one question that is encouraged to be pondered often is, 'why are you eating?' The answer, for me, to this question would often be 'I don't know' or 'I guess because I'm bored'. The rationale behind these questions are to get you to stop, think and if needed reconsider your choice. You see, often times people, especially women, seek out what should be intrinisic or found in Christ through a relationship or marriage. When this is the main purpose of a relationship it will never work. Sadly, this episode seems to be on 'repeat' in our society today among women.
6. Complete pre-marital counseling. This is a great tool to have in your tool box before you slip on that ring but you will only get out what you put into the sessions. Be active in your counseling. When my husband and I were completeing our workbook we set aside specific days and time to go through the topics and really discuss them. I imagine (and I'm sure he would agree) this was a lot easier for me than him. Yet, he knew how much we would benefit (and we did) from this time.

I'm not saying your marriage will be perfect or without flaws if you consider these words of wisdom, but starting with a firm foundation is a lot easier than repairing a broken foundation. Please feel free to leave comments below. Perhaps you have some tips you would like to add or something you wish you would have considered before getting married.

In Christ,
Created for this

 

 

 

 

Protecting your marriage

Your husband is not your glorified boyfriend and you are not his glorified girlfriend. Rather, each of you are helpmates joined together through a holy committment in Christ. It would be my guess that most everyone reading this post would agree; however, marriage in America especially within the Christian community is on a hiatus. Separation and divorce seem to be the fix should problems arise. I knew several ladies that decided to get married because it was the 'next step' in their relationship instead of knowing that this was the one the Lord had ordained for them.

Having several friends who are struggling in their marriage I am aware that the problems are very real and therefore the efforts to restore and save the marriage must be just as major as the struggles facing these couples. I am by no means a marriage counselor but I do know that I have seen the Lord do great things in my life when I am obedient to his word and seek his help and wisdom when I am lost - what better area to apply these same principles than marriage.

The challenges below are not only for those who have found their marriage in a rough place. No, in fact I would say these are perhaps even more crucial for those who find themselves in successful and fulfilling marriages. Why, you ask? The answer is simple in that you must be on your guard at all times and protect your marriage. I once heard marriage likened to that of a child: requiring lots of energy and devotion in the beginning and as it matures becoming more self-sufficent, yet you never for one day stop showing concern and exerting effort to ensure your child is safe and thriving.

• Pray! Pray often for your marriage, husband and yourself. Yes, I said 'yourself' because often when ask for the Lord to do a work in someone else we also become aware of areas that we need transforming. Be ready though because with revelation comes responsibility. When the Lord reveals you to an area that needs transformation within yourself be willing to swallow your pride and work towards those changes.
• Realize LOVE is a choice. Often we define love as a feeling but rather I believe it is a feeling that is created by the choices we make to put our spouse first. When you commit to a marriage you aren't just committing when times are good and rejecting your spouse when times are bad. If there is a member of body that is sick and ailing we do not simply seek out amputation or removal. No, instead we will often spend lots of money and time fighting to keep that member a part of the body. The same should be with our spouse. Just as it is written in Joshua - 'choose who you will serve this day..' choose and purpose in your heart to love your spouse. While this choice may be one that needs to be reaffirmed every day or even every moment as you battle against the struggles. Remember that why we do something ultimately determines what we do.
• Find a mentor. Titus speaks to the importance of older women mentoring younger women as wives and mothers. There is a lot of wisdom to be gleaned from women who have 'been there and one that'. If you have one of these women actively pouring into your life be sure to bless her and remind her how much you are thankful for her wisdom and encouragement.
• Avoid toxic people. Today's media is increasingly portraying and addressing men as idiots and incapable of serving as the leader in their marriage and home. Guard your heart and mind against such schools of thought including people who share these sentiments. Surround yourself with women who honor and respect their husbands.
• Fast. I've always been told 'when you don't know the way, fast and pray!'. I guess my motto is that it can never hurt to remove distractions from our lives so that we can better receive the word and direction of the Lord.

Tomorrow I will be offering encouragement and some words of wisdom to women who are not yet married. In honor of my father, it will be titled 'an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure'. I will be sharing some decisions my husband and I made before we got married and why I'm glad we did!

So I leave you with this question: What things have you done to support the success of your marriage or to revive your marriage? Thanks for participating and remember we were created for this!